Muggle Studies
by Jayne DLM
Summary: I had always viewed Muggle studies as a joke. After all, I didn't attend Hogwarts to learn about mudbloods. Yet here I was, a Malfoy, being forced to attend a muggle 'excursion'. Written for Round 9 of the Houses Competition. Oneshot.


**Muggle Studies**

* * *

 **Round 9 Houses Competition**  
 **House: Ravenclaw**  
 **Role/Year 6th Year**  
 **Category Standard 1205**  
 **Prompt: Object - Canoe/kayaking**

* * *

I had always viewed Muggle Studies as a joke. After all, I didn't attend Hogwarts to learn about mudbloods. Yet here I was, a Malfoy, being forced to attend a muggle 'excursion'.

We departed Hogwarts at some outrageous hour of the morning, when the sun had not risen, and the House Elves were still asleep. Imagine my horror when our wands were seized, our clothes were transfigured into muggle style clothing and we were shuttled into a dangerous muggle transportation device. I since learned it was called a bus.

The bus was cramped, it smelt, and there was a sticky substance stuck under and on the back of the seats. It wasn't long into before we were addressed by our Muggle Studies teacher, Professor Burbage who propped herself up on her front.

"Attention class. For today's excursion we will be going to the Montang River where we will be Kayaking. Now, who can tell me what Kayaking is?".

She looked down the aisle of the bus expectantly.

"Sounds like a disease" I quipped which earned sniggers from my fellow Slytherin classmates.

Of course swot extraordinaire Granger raised her arm with her usual misplaced arrogance.

"Kayaking is a muggle water sport" she said in her know it all voice.

"Very good Miss Granger. Kayaking is essentially where you are in a small boat and paddle across water. Today we will be kayaking in pairs and you will negotiate your way down the Montang River".

"How will the pairs be decided?" Lavender asked as she not so subtly was making eyes at the Weasel.

"We will draw them out of a hat" the Professor responded with slightly raised eyebrows. With that, she grabbed a strange looking brown hat from beside her.

"In this hat are the names of every student. You will pass it around and pick a name out of the hat. Whoever you draw out of the hat will be your kayaking partner for the day".

The hat was passed around, and each person read out their partner. It was no doubt this muggle method had some interesting partnerships. Neville and Parkinson, Crabbe and Padma, Millicent and Lavender, Greengrass and Finnigan. They were people who barely spoke, much less partnered up for anything. I couldn't help but chuckle at my friend's misfortune and wondered whether there might be a murder after today.

I was only half paying attention, when I heard my name read out by the one and only, Hermione Granger. I sneered at her from across the bus and she looked equally as irritated.

The bus trip dragged on and felt like hours, probably exacerbated by the fact I was dreading having to spend any time with the know-it-all mudblood.

Eventually the bus came to a standstill and it was clear we had arrived at our destination.

Once outside I noticed that we were surrounded by a tall pine forest. There was a wooden building labelled Visitors Centre, and fifteen or so strange long looking contraptions which I could only assume were kayaks on the water's edge.

Before long a tall blonde lady came out of the wooden building and greeted the Professor warmly. She stood in front of the class and proceeded to give instructions, most of which I didn't understand. She said that the key to kayaking was teamwork, so I was certain I was doomed. For there was no way me and Granger would ever make a good team.

With that, we were told us to go get changed into a wetsuit (whatever they were) and a hideous orange puffy jacket. Apparently wearing this jacket could be the difference between life and death.

The boys went into the boys change rooms, and we were horrified when we saw what a wetsuit was. It was a skin tight piece of black clothing from head to toe and left little room for the imagination, or anything else for that matter.

We all emerged from the change room, to be greeted by the girls, and my eyes immediately found that of my partner for the day. She had not put on the life jacket yet and I would be lying if I didn't admit she looked good. The skin tight wetsuit really left nothing to the imagination. Merlins balls, who would have thought Granger was hiding that under her robes!

I immediately chastised myself for my impure thoughts and covered them up how I always did.

"Come on frizzball, lets get this over with".

It turns out that getting into the kayak was much harder than it looked. First Granger got in, then I tried to get in. However my normal Malfoy elegance had left me and the kayak flipped over, dunking her straight in the water.

"You idiot" she screeched at me.

I couldn't help but laugh as she emerged from the water looking like an angry wet kneazle.

So the next time I got in first, but it was Granger who struggled to get in. It seemed this life jacket was perhaps not so life-saving after all. I watched her struggle for a while before I finally outstretched my hand to help her in. She eyed it like it was poison before resigning herself and made a deal with the devil. I pulled her up with little effort as she weighed next to nothing. The kayak rocked and rolled however we sat upright and it seemed to balance.

The next part to kayaking was paddling and this was easier said than done. We needed to get our timing right, and on more than one occasion Granger almost took me out with her big stick. Granted I may have made a few comments about how she would have to steer the kayak as I couldn't see past her boofy hair.

In any case, after some time we found our rhythm. That was until we started to head well and truly downstream.

"Malfoy I don't like this, it's getting faster"

"Way to point out the obvious Granger"

Then down a particularly bumpy drop in the river the kayak went airborne and capsized.

The water was cold, and the current was quick.

"Ahhhh" squealed Granger as we both clung to the kayak for dear life.

I looked over and saw her panic in her brown eyes and something strange happened. I was nice.

"It's going to be ok Granger" I tried to reassure her from across the overturned kayak. After all, the life jacket did seem to have a purpose as it kept us mostly above water.

Thankfully, the current of the river slowed down around the bend, and together we were able to drag the kayak back to the shore.

"That was crazy" Granger exclaimed, clearly out of breath.

I just nodded in agreement. Muggles were mad to do this voluntarily.

We made the decision to have a rest and sat next to each other on a log, silently watching the other pairs go past.

"You know, for a near drowned ferret, you're not too bad Malfoy" she said with a wry smile and a cheeky sideways glance.

"Same to you frizz ball" I quirked back looking straight at her without any pretense.

Maybe there was something to be learnt in Muggle Studies after all.


End file.
